Started From The Bottom Now We Here

We made it! The longest and most brutal twelve weeks of my life have reached a semi-climactic end. My tendon has, medically speaking, returned to full strength and so I'm free to push open doors to my heart's content. Whether or not I feel mentally ready for that is an entirely different story, but I can't deny how good it feels to know that picking up a cup of coffee no longer carries a health risk.

The real fact of the matter is that this journey doesn't end here. Not even close. There's still a lot of healing left for my body to do (shout out to my antibodies for being total lazy bones and taking their sweet time) which means my hand still feels really super weird (that's a medical term) and will do for at least another few months. Hooray me.

Despite all the physio and the endless hours of forcing myself to get back to normality, I still haven't regained the natural instinct that comes with having two fully-functioning hands. Nothing feels natural anymore. Even now, am I using my index finger to type this? Nope. Am I able to use it to type things? Sure, it's just not all that enjoyable and so my brain has decided that it's easier to just avoid using it wherever possible.

Am I being dramatic? Possibly. But I've said it before, and I'll say it again, "you never know what you have until you no longer have it". Your hands are a huge part of who you are. Will your eyebrows still be on fleek if you only have one hand to draw them on with? Will your poached eggs be completely smooth if you only have one hand to crack the shell with? These are the important questions at times like this. And only time will tell you the answer.

Not only has this experience physically changed me, it's also had a huge impact mentally. Go figure. I actually lost some of the movement in my index finger for a good seven or so weeks because of the amount of trauma within the area, and it was mentally agonising trying to get it back.

Regardless of what happens next, I now know what it is to be brave, what it is to be strong, and what it is to say a giant "fuck you" to a Starbucks employee who cracks a hugely misplaced joke.

Stay away from knives, or better yet, keep out of the kitchen entirely.
~ Eleanor xo

| And if none of the above makes sense, you can read part one here and part two here |

The 'using my birthday as an excuse to buy myself things' Haul

If there's one day in a year that deserves a completely-dedicated-to-you haul, it's your birthday. Am I right or am I right? So when this day finally rolls around for me in the middle of each August, I like to go full-on #TreatYoSelf, a la Tom Haverford from Parks & Rec (literally the best show).

I think it's important to have a good solid mentality about it. I mean, I've kept myself alive for this many years, therefore I deserve to shower myself with love and presents because I am the one. All the regrets, bad decisions and evening meals where I ate all my vegetables have led me to this moment. I'm going to buy that obscenely expensive item. And I'm not going to regret it even a tiny bit. At least until my next bank statement comes through...

1. I've wanted to try out this Re-balancing Black Soap from L'Occitane for so long

2. Already addicted to drinking my morning cups of coffee out of this Anthropologie 'Rise & Shine' mug 

3. These hot summer days mean this Shea Butter Lip Balm from L'Occitane is a definite must-have

4. This Vera Moda via Asos belt can be worn at any length, around the waist or hips, making it super handy

5. I cannot even begin to explain how dreamy this Olive Leaf & Lemon Candle from Anthropologie smells

6. I feel like I've been searching my whole life for this perfect pair of skin tight grey ankle jeans by Pilcro and The Letterpress via Anthropologie

7. I love this floaty cotton, boho-esque blouse from Mango

8. This Asos high-waisted rope tie mini skirt means I can still rock the denim and potentially get a little sun on my pasty legs

9. This airy Light Blue Cotton Shirt from Mango is amazing for the weather right now

10. And if you love something, you should totally buy it in every colour, so I also picked it up in Blue & White Stripes

11. This Grey Fitted Shirt I picked up at the Polo Ralph Lauren Factory Store at Gunwharf Quays is so flattering

12. Twenty-two is going to be the year of the plaid, and I could not put this Hollister shirt down

~ Eleanor xo

How Account Handling Has Changed Me

I almost can't quite believe the words I'm about to type: I have been an account exec for one whole year. Actually, if we want to get exact about it, it's been a whole year and a week (because blog post scheduling is hard *sad face*).

Making it through a whole year of employment isn't exactly a huge achievement for a lot of people, but this is my first real job, and the fact I haven't blown it (yet) makes it a huge deal for me. Not only that, but the amount of growing and learning I've done in the last twelve months is honestly astronomical (love that word, it's far too underused) so it feels right that I take a look back and review how far I've come. Plus, in the future when I'm A) a real housewife of Beverly Hills who no longer needs to work or B) a washed up has-been, I can look back at these golden times and reminisce about life as I started out in my career.

• I'm way more confident when speaking to new people.
• I no longer have a fear of picking up the phone.
• I can spell 'available'.
• I find creating spreadsheets hugely therapeutic.
• I'm 100% not a fan of buffet lunches. How many sandwiches is too many sandwiches?!
• Automotive clients are my thing. I absolutely love working with car brands.
• I also happen to know everything there is to know about car finance so.
• Still no idea what I'm supposed to do with my mountain of business cards.
• My immune system SUCKS #TwoDaysOffSickForAThroatInfectionSayWHAAAAT
• Sometimes things get a bit stressful.
• I thrive off the stress.
• I swear a lot more now.
• I've more than definitely effed up my back from slouching in my desk chair.
• It look me about six months to pluck up the courage to use the coffee machine.
• I'm not very good at keeping secrets. Especially when I've signed something to say I have to keep something a secret.
• I'm slowly learning how to participate in conversations with people about their children...
• I write a humongous amount of lists.
• I bullet point absolutely everything. In case that wasn't already obvious.
• I know what an umlaut is.
• I have become a morning person.
• Leftover meeting food is the one.
• I heard the chief of PSA finance speak at a conference in January and I now wish to name my future son, Cruciano.
• My voice goes so high whenever I chirp "Morning!" that I'm sure only dogs can hear it.
• The joy of pay day lasts for about two seconds before you remember all the bills you have to pay.
• I like being surrounded by such an array of accents. #PronounceMyNameAgain
• Still no idea how I'm expected to answer the question "So how was your weekend?" when all I did was fill my online Anthropologie cart and then exit the tab before looking at the final price.
• You can make it through three years of university and never play beer pong. Your first work Christmas party and you're being forced to play by your Account Director. Obvs.
• It's a good idea to have a standard greetings card message that you can whip out at any time, for any occasion.
• It's always someone's birthday.
• Using the devices to test things is my worst nightmare. SO. MANY. GERMS.
• I sound really posh when I answer the phone. It's awful.
• The stairs in my office are really hard to maneuver. Or is that just my overly long feet?
• The autocorrect on Mac is a sneaky little bitch. You know full well that is not what I wanted to type.
• Everyone's on a diet until someone brings in biscuits.

~ Eleanor xo